Afterbirth and other things you should never Google image search

Afterbirth.

So here I we are merrily chugging along post Uwharrie through March with the completion of the Palmetto State O-run (yes, I know I never wrote a report), followed up with the USMC Mud Run (I'm really slacking, I get it) on April 21st and then my wife decides to screw up all my plans and pop out the chubby cheeker a month early on April 29th!  Philosopher's Way (5/5) has officially become the race I pay for every year and never run...  This also pretty much marked the end of my running career and the beginning of my foray into daddy daycare services along with the end of sleep.

About to get all hot 'n' sweaty with a 97ti

Little did she know, I was secretly whoring it up with every hotel treadmill I could get my hands on during business trips!  Sadly, this still only amounts to a few days of running each month.  Fast forward to August and we now have a fat and happy 4+ month old and a reliable babysitter to help me out.  I also have the impending Spartan Beast and Carolina Tough Mudder to contend with in October.  Both paid for long ago, and we have already lost one team member to knee surgery, so I figure I should probably try and start running again.  I'm sure the 15lbs of rock hard muscle <cough> I've added in the last 4+ months will only improve my running skills...

So this Thursday I ventured outdoors to run for only the third time since Chunk's arrival (or his release, for all you pro-lifers out there).  Nothing like the warm embrace of a 90 degree day in the afternoon sun to welcome me back.  I'm pretty sure I looked like the guy we all have seen who is walking but has the shuffle and arm swing of a runner.  That's about how I felt too.  Nothing quite like redlining while trying to run a flat course for a 13+ minute mile.  OUCH.

Now this outdoor running shouldn't be such a big deal, as we have a treadmill at home.. actually, we have two.  The only problem is they are both pictured below.  As my wife can tell you, I can fix anything, it's just that my mean time to completion is around 1-2 years for most repairs, but I'm really close this time... I SWEAR.

redneck runner: when you have at least one non-working treadmill in your house.

I want to thank everyone out there for hanging in there and I hope to provide you with more entertainment in the future.  P.S. I still lurk on all your blogs, and I'm scared of how fast you've all become.